Have a Wonderful Winter Solstice, Happy Holidays and a Fabulous New Year!
And "Don't forget to smile!"
The title of Harry Potter's last book revealed, the NYTimes writing about a Dick in a Box (the SNL skit silly), and a Chicago mom finds homo-porn on a gift Zune for her daughter [via gear factor]!
Wow, it's been a hectic holiday season so far! Parties here, shopping there, and running into two exes at a party thrown by someone I dated. Sounds like a bad soap opera, doesn't it? Yea, that's what my coworker said too.
With all that's happened, I figure the best way to tell it all is to, well, not tell it at all. I'll just let the pictures speak for themselves. And no, you won't find any pictures of said 'triple ex' party. Read more [+/-]
Then the company holiday party. Oh lord. [more]
I can't believe I spent nearly 6 hours editing and retouching all those photos. The price of beauty!
If you're done with the visual stimulation, check out this spoof on A Christmas Carol [via wired]! It'll help you get over the fact that this year, Annie (starring Kathy Lee) is playing at the Madison Square Garden's theater instead.
Obviously not me. And especially not when I've had a few drinks.
Needless to say, it was a great night; and if you haven't had the pleasure, definitely give their podcast a chance (especially the one where they call me a 'super fan'!).
Can you imagine what I'd do at the Gay Erotic Expo this weekend?!
I have to admit that I'm always skeptical when someone on the online world wants to meet me in the real world. You could never be sure of who they are, no matter what's on their blog. That could be the side effect of being raised in New York City.
So when Will said he'd want to meet me, I was naturally skeptical - at least it wasn't as SWF as having someone with the same name asking to meet up (like some unnamed friend). I needed a plan. In public. And possibly some witnesses. Since he was a blogger, I planned a meet up with some other bloggers (and a blog-stalker).
I instantly recognized him inside the Milford and we headed to the Ritz to meet up with the rest of the party, which was already in progress. Luckily, he turned out to be a pretty cool guy; and I didn't have to open a can of cardio-kickbox on his ass.
Lots of fun was had, along with the alcohol. Unfortunately, I have nothing scandalous to report. Other than the flashing.
Speaking of which, I hear Feast of Fools is having another New York Meet-n-Greet this Thursday! I'm so there!
I caught him briefly on the tube while on a special Boopy Family Thanksgiving trip to Ohio; an 8 hour drive, overnight stay, Thanksgiving dinner (including a 'traditional' green bean casserole!), then 8 hours back to New York City. Thinking about it, we spent the same amount of time on the road as we did in Ohio, including sleeping.
It was worth it though, I learned a lot (going on the trip, not watching the parade). Such as, in New Jersey, you can't pump your own gas at any one of the hundreds of "full-service-only gas stations" and gas attendants don't work on Thanksgiving. Luckily, we found an open gas station before it was too late and didn't need to find out if New Jersey's highway patrol worked on Thanksgiving.
For those not good with the numbers, it's an average of 8:02 per mile; or an average speed of 7.48 mph.
Can you see the resemblance?
That's me at 3.75 miles. And if it looks like I'm suffering, it's because I am.
I was pleasantly surprised at how well I did. I even managed to pick up speed and sprint the last 50 feet or so - which was pretty hard considering the amount of people running the race (6000+). When I was sprinting toward the end, I had to tap this one guy on the shoulder because he was in my way; I bet I could have cut down the 9 seconds if I just ran him over. But I digress.
In anycase, I attribute my performance to the great running weather. And of course a great pacer (thanks!). And my boopy for his support!
Oh right, peer pressure.
Any way, won't you support my efforts? All you need to do is point your credit cards to my personal donation page. Special THANKS to those who already have! With your help, I was able to spread many rumors on how it was possible for me to amass the dollar amount of donations I received in such a short period of time. (Hint: I'd do anything for charity. Anything.)
I was also thinking I might be able to elicit more donations if I promised to run in my Halloween costume if I made $1,000 in donations, but it might cause a flurry of donations so enormous as to shut down their entire website... and we don't want that, now do we? No, but you can still donate.
And if you can't afford to donate, help me out by spreading the word - especially to your rich, philanthropic friends/boss/booty call! Knowing you made a difference will give you those warm, fuzzy feelings inside; like beer!
After more than a year hiatus from cardio kickboxing, I decided to take one at the gym yesterday. Remembering how strenuous it was, I was concerned I wouldn't be able to keep up; though I convinced myself that if I could run 4 miles, I could handle the class. And I did! Read more [+/-]
Well, sort of. In between the jump roping, push ups, jabs, bobs, kicks, crosses, knees, and switches, my lungs were aching for air and halfway through the 45 min class I had to pretend I needed water so I could take a break. (At that point, I probably did need water.) After, I conceded to performing 'easier' versions of the moves, and I finished the class without passing out; and in the end, isn't that the most important part?
If that wasn't enough, I decided to go all out and take the class after: Cardio Video Dance. "What's that?", you ask? Oh, just your average 'low-intensity' choreographed dance moves set to popular music - in other words, pretending you're in a dance video. I was convinced that if the guy in last weeks' class can do it in (2 inch silver pumps, I can do it in sneakers. Hence my hour long experience as a Pussy Cat Doll.
I reminisced back to my high school days when I was a 'dancer', but 'low-intensity' my ass (which is now hurting along with my back, front, legs, hips, shoulders, thighs, and everywhere in between) these people were fierce, fast, and unapologetic. Luckily, I was able to keep up (without making myself look too much like a fool), albeit most of the moves were more 'exotic dancer' than 'video dance'; which is probably why I'll do it again next week.
Loosen up my buttons baby!
Have you ever worked with someone that is so incompetent, you want to punch yourself in the face? And not just your playful knock on the jaw, but a full-fledged bashing where you put your head on a flat surface and mole-knock yourself upside your own head. (How appropriate for me to think this on election day, no?)
I know this is far from an original, personal experience, but for my ability to handle this one person without causing bodily harm to anyone (including myself), I think I deserve a gold star. Or maybe a cookie.
And some other unrelated thoughts...
This morning, on my way to work, I saw a fairly slim (not skinny) Asian guy drinking a Myoplex shake and I thought to myself, "I wonder if that works. It doesn't seem to be working for him. Unless he started it last week. It's so hard for Asian people to be big and muscley. I guess every little bit helps. Maybe he was skinnier before. Maybe he has an eating disorder and his doctor told him to drink it. I wonder if it'll work for me. Nah; who wants to drink chalk every morning."
Happy Voting Day people!
Good news is that Boopy's mother is well on her way to recovery. Thanks to everyone who gave their well wishes. You guys are the best!
Now onto the gooder news - It's Halloween!
I spent nearly two weeks planning my costume and when I finally decided to pull all the pieces together, I had less than 3 days; which means that my initial plan to go as a slutty geisha didn't work out. This dishonor would result in jigai, but that would require me to be in costume. Oh well.
Luckily I had two backup plans; after consulting with my sister, I decided on one (not this one). When I got home and test-drove the outfit, I was excited; no, I was ecstatic! So much that I actually dreamed about being in costume and dancing around the street.
But will my coworkers (especially the people in HR) think it's appropriate to be so fabulous at work? I must admit I had some concerns (not enough to stop me, obviously). Everyone loved it. Some thought I was a bit over the top, probably exacerbated by the fact I was one out of 6 people in the whole company that dressed in costume to work. Some even thought I was a new employee (isn't that sweet?!). What can I say? I love bringing a smile to people's faces.
Let's just hope the people in the Halloween parade do the same! Happy Halloween ya'll!
I realize that I don't grieve very long. I think it's because I've had a lot of experience with it, and determined the best way to cope. After all, I'm all about efficiency.
What that means is that I now tend to put myself in a positive mindset with every situation. In addition, I also keep in mind that in the end, 'Que Sera Sera'. This may come off as emotionless or heartless, but I really wear my heart on my sleeve. I just know that sometimes it's healthier to change my shirt.
Feel emotions, experience them, move on. Do it with a positive outlook.
What I've also realized is that I find it hard to comfort other people well. I want to help people feel better, but my method includes making them smile and laugh (laughter is the best medicine, right?). It can also be inappropriate, and crossing the line is what makes me nervous, which in turn makes me uncomfortable.
This is how I feel right now. Boopy's is with his mother, who is in the hospital, hundred of miles away. I feel sad, in part through his grief for his mother, and in part of not being able to be there next to him. I've already relinquished control of this situation because this is what life dealt me, and I take each opportunity to speak with him on the phone.
During each call, I have this gut reaction to make him laugh or have him talk about his emotions; in essence, have him follow my grieving process. But I stop myself because it is his experience, not mine. So what I do is listen.
Stay strong baby. One day at a time. I'm here for you.
The lady downstairs hates me. I think it's because I continue to have guests over (well, it's really just one permanent guest). What's worse is that she's the mother of the landlord - which as previously resulted in a call asking if we moved in another resident. (The answer is no, by the way.)
I can understand if she feels territorial, but I pay the damn rent; I'm entitled to do whatever the hell I want (as long as I'm not making a ruckus or buring the place down), right? In the words of the soon-to-be-divorced Bobby Brown, 'It's my prerogative'.
It's sad because when I first moved in, she would reply with a smile and nod when I greeted her. Now it's just one of those all-knowing-evil stares (and now I wonder if she can hear us through the ceiling).
That's not a problem because I have a BA in Not Taking Shit from People; so I just ignore her. However, what I wasn't trained for was having their dog take a dump on my welcome mat; which has never happened before she showed her distain for me. Coincidence?
It's National Coming Out Day ya'll! Ah.. I remember my coming out like it was yesterday...
(Cue flashback sound effects.)
"Sister, I'm gay." "O-kay. Are you going to tell mom?"
"Mom, I'm gay." "NOOooo!" (shriek of terror)
"Err.. does that mean no grandchildren for me? There's always time to change..." (Cue tears, hug)
"Dad, I'm gay." "Whatever makes you happy."
(Cue sappy music as everyone looks into the distance. Pan up, fade to white.)
Okay, that was slightly over-dramatic (you can read what actually happened on Christmas Day with My Family).
Since then, I haven't explicitly told my extended family (most of them figured it out via gossip, and some even through mass media), least of all my grandmother. That changed last weekend.
I had invited Boopy to come with me for a weekend of festivities in the middle of Penn, including my teamed triathlon and my aunts' partners' birthday party (yes, there's another homo in my family). During the party, my drunk aunt decided to introduce, rather, announce the families to the attending guests. Over microphone. All was fine until she realized that I also had a guest for her to announce.
"And we're also lucky to have Jase's boyfriend, Boopy!"
Of which I didn't have much time because my non-English-speaking Grandmother whipped her head around to me and uttered, 'boyfriend?' My initial response was to deny it, so I did, but she wasn't listening anymore and quickly excused herself to the bathroom.
"She just got out of the hospital, now you want to send her back," my mom chided my still-drunken aunt. "Oops. Well, it's better coming from me, right?"
When she returned (from bawling her eyes out my mom assured me), all she said (in Chinese) was, "Don't be crazy like your aunt." Luckily, I have a lot of experience ignorning my grandmother. Not so was Boopy who had to endure the wrath of the evil-squinty-eyes for the rest of the weekend.
This had to be the most interesting weekend this year by far. I don't know which was more exciting: running 4 miles in a teamed triathlon, having my grandmother faint and having to go to the hospital, or having my drunk aunt accidentally out me (and my boopy) to my grandmother. Or all the drama involved.
The last two had nothing to do with each other. Really.
Granny's okay (thanks for your concern) - she was released from the hospital the same day. As for the effects of the accidental outing, those have yet to be determined.
This past weekend marked the start of my volunteering to tutor fourth graders in English and Math (in preparation for their advancement exams). These kids never cease to amaze me; and are a constant reminder that I won't be having any of my own anytime soon.
The week before was the mandatory training session. I've done them before, and given that it was my third year, I shared some stories and advice (what a surprise, huh?). What was new this year was the finger-printing and background check. Working with minors, it makes sense; and thinking about it, they should have done this in previous years, too.
That's all fine. I don't have any skeletons in my closet (that I'm afraid to share with the world). Fingers, fingers, thumb, thumb, done. "Did you bring the $25 fee for the background check?" Excuse me?!
They want me to pay for my own background check?! To volunteer?! In essence, they're making me pay to volunteer! That's almost as stupid as those prepaid credit cards!
Is it just me? Does anyone else see the issue here? Should I just pay the $25 fee, even though I think the organization should pay (considering I'm volunteering my time)? I doubt they'd stop me from volunteering, but do I want to risk having people be mad at me? And I love enacting power over those little brats (just kidding).
What's really surprising is how none of the other volunteers are opposing this fee (which is probably due to the fact that I'm one of two returning volunteers). Maybe I'm just that cheap observant?
Last Friday I went to a late, late showing of Oedipus for Kids! It was awesome. Just awesome.
I'm not a big musical theater fan, but I do know what I like, and this is it. With songs like A Little Complex and My Lover is my Husband is my Son, how can you not?
And how apropos it was to run into Barrett Foa of Spelling Bee (and Avenue Q)! Perhaps he's looking for more crazy (not-really-for) childrens' plays to do? (Start the rumor mills!)
Anyway, if you didn't infer from the title, the production is indeed an over-the-top recreation of a childrens' theater company performing a 'revised' version of the story of Oedipus.
Great wordplay in the songs. Good timing on the jokes; hell, the leading actress still went on stage even though she broke her foot the day before (albeit sitting on an office chair)! The show must go on!
And now that the NYMTF is over, I really do hope the show goes on... so I can see it again!
Photo by the awesome Jason Smith.
A lot of random stuff going on in my head today. Like when I was in the bathroom, just thinking about work. I started to think about how to be more productive at work. Then I started to think about the law of diminishing returns, and how it might be partially explained by people being social (in the workplace). Example: The more people you hire, the more opportunity for people to socialize in the office, and therefore less productivity. And let's not forget the time consumption of those in-office affairs.
And speaking of which, the 3rd season of The Office premiered last night! It was awesome, and in case you missed it, the topic was 'outing' someone at work (here's a preview and summary). LOVED it - especially how they wrapped up the show with Michael staring out the window as Oscar is picked up by his 'roommate', "There's Oscar's roommate. I wonder if he knows." and during Oscar's interview when he admits, "Sometimes, it pays to be gay."
After seeing their eye-catching posters, reading about it in Business Week, and finally landing on their informative webpage, I ordered myself one of those Norelco Bodygroom shavers from Amazon and tried it out... Read more [+/-]
Sorry, no pictures this time; but the Bodygroom is pretty good. Comfortable grip, easy to use, and no snags at all - even on those more tender areas. All that's left is smooth skin. And yes, everyone has some hair down there.
Now to do deal with those ingrown hairs...
And speaking about being excited, I was doubly excited that I got to go to Rob Byrnes' book party for his new book, When the Stars Come Out at Vlada! I was even lucky enough to get him away from his adoring fans and grab this candid shot!
How awesome is that?! (I'll let you know how awesome his book is.)
It seems that I shocked a few people (and a coworker) when they pulled up a recent picture of mine that was a bit too risqué... while at work.
With that said, consider this your warning: The following may shock you (and a coworker). Viewer discretion is advised (because I don't have any). Read more [+/-]
I don't see what the big fuss is about. It's not like I'm naked or anything - I'm wearing lights! What do you think?
Maryland was great. (who knew?)
The wedding was beautiful.
The bride was stunning.
I can't believe I wore brown wool.
Picking your own fruit isn't as fun as it seems.
The navigation system is only as smart as the driver who picks the route.
In other news, I finally took advantage of my health insurance and went to the doctor to get a check up. All's well, except she said I might be slightly anemic. Eek. More tests to follow.
Update: Crap, another outbreak.
I told my friend I was headed down to Bethesda, Maryland this weekend for a wedding and this is how he responds:
"news reports are saying slick roads and flooding south of here....Well, I'll have you know that he actually crossed it. I'll do my best not to get stranded, but I think that whole 'crossing the Delaware in a van' thing sounds awesome.
you don't want to be stranded in delaware...that's where washington and his troops were stranded...i don't want to see you in a famous painting trying to traverse a river in your van. it's just too soccer mom for me."
Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend ya'll!
Whether you're tired of the anti-gay bigots Focus on the Family, interested in being ex-homo, or just want some free stuff, check out this article from The Stranger which provides you directions on how to have an all-out, guilt-free shopping spree, courtesy of FotF themselves.
Disclaimer: I neither endorse nor denounce the method set forth by the article, but who can resist some free stuff?!
Me: "What's his name again? Peanut?"
Boop: "You mean Skip?"
Me: "Oh yea! Why did I think it was Peanut?"
Boop: "I don't know. There's no one named Peanut."
Me: "Oh, I know why! It was because Skip is short for Skippy; and Skippy is yummy peanut butter; and that's made from peanuts. So I used Peanut to remember his name!"
Boop: "Hehe.. looks like it worked."
My goodness, it was a crazy weekend. Unfortunately it didn't involve any snakes on any planes. Instead, there were crazy kids in chocolate factories. Read more [+/-]
I went with Kvn to see Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory as a part of RiverFlicks on the Hudson (later joined by tribecat and friend). I forgot how dark the movie was. I kept thinking how the opening scene of the movie, where they sing "Candyman" while the Candyman throws candy at the rabid children, was promoting candy like it was a drug. "It's like they're on crack," I remember saying; and thinking how I wouldn't want anything to do with those kids after they're done with their candy binging. But I digress.
Anyway, the 'dark part' I was referring to was Gene Wilder's depiction of Willy Wonka and how he doesn't really care for the spoiled brats. When he's screaming is pretty scary too.
And I finally realized that's where that "We have so much time, and so little to do! Strike that, reverse it." reference came from when Gene guest-starred on Will & Grace! Awesome!
Later that night, I went to the new StarBar, a 'cozier' version of the debunked Starlight. Pretty crowded and a few cuties. Then it was off to the new Boys' Room location for a bit of dancing. It was a good night, except for the part where the L train stops working, forcing me to take a cab home.
Saturday morning run was bad due to the lack of sleep and water; but I made it all up by going to a rooftop party and then celebrating my friend E's birthday at Fat Black Pussycat.
With the people she invited, it was an all out college reunion. Was that a good or bad thing? I plead the fifth. But what I will say is that there were plenty of ass grabs, thigh grabs, and even a lesbian booby grab. Damn, why do people get so grabby when they're around me?
I cut that night short, for Sunday was a double dose of Fringe Festival plays. There was definitely much left to be desired. That's all I have to say about that.
By Monday, I was totally wiped out and had to take a sick day. Of course, I took that as an opportunity to bake chocolate chip cookies. They were delicious.
While walking to the subway, I saw some hot guy on a bike with a big snake. It was big, blue, and stuffed. And it was hanging around his neck.
My first thought was, "Snakes on a Bike!" And that reminded me that Snakes on a Plane comes out today! I am SO there! Kvn had the best idea of bringing some toy snakes into the theater (a la Rocky Horror Picture Show) and throwing them up in the air at opportune moments.
You can even get a voice mail from Samuel L. Jackson! Hm.. I suspect that some people I know will be getting a few of them...
"Mutha-fuckin snakes on the mutha-fuckin plane!" Whee!
Sitting in front of the computer at work, I thought up the following situation that totally cracked me up: Read more [+/-]
Now that I'm working so close to Korea town in Manhattan, I've finally figured out what to ask those Christian missionary types when they approach me to find out if I've found the Lord and Savior,
"If God created Adam and Eve, and both Adam and Eve were white, where do Koreans come from?"
I'm sure that'll catch them by surprise. And when they start to formulate an answer (that is, if their brains don't implode first), I'll scream,
And walk away.
I just knew what was coming when Boopy and I were walking down Irving Place, hand in hand, and I notice one "tank-top wearing, loose-pant hanging, wanna-be thug" white boy look at his friend and make a nod towards us. (Funny, his friend didn't seem to care.) As we passed them, under some scaffolding, I heard him start at a whisper, "Fags."
At first we just continued walking, but his calls became louder and more creative. "Faggity fags!" "Fucking faggity fags!" I'd had enough.
"Are you kidding me?!" I thought to myself. Then turning to face Boopy, aghast, and said quite loudly, "Fuck! That hick back there is right! You are a fag! I better go find me some pussy, posthaste!" With our verbal assaulter stunned silent, I continued, "Who am I kidding?! I like dick as much as that hickity hick says he doesn't!" and engaged in a round of tonsil hockey with my Boopy.
Okay, that last paragraph didn't happen; it was one of a dozen scenarios playing through my head (another includes a chainsaw) as we made our way to the movie theater, holding each others' hand tighter. Honestly, ignoring and avoiding confrontation is the best solution to that situation. You never know what they might be hiding in their pocket or how many friends they have around the corner. Especially if you realize you left your mace (and/or chainsaw) in your other murse. It's scary to think that we were only a few blocks where Kevin Aviance was assaulted.
Anyway, we saw The Night Listener - ohh.. this movie is delicious.
Addendum: If you were a victim of a GLBT bias crime, be sure to give the Anti-Violence Project a call at (212) 714-1141. (Thanks Crash)
Thanks to the Oh! Network, Sue Johanson, and Sadie Allison, I now know the three best positions for pregnant women to have sex: on top, doggy style, and spooning (make sure you wrap your legs behind him!).
What other trivia did I learn? Women can experience their first orgasms while pregnant. Your man can't get you off? You know what to do. "Of course I'm on the pill!"
Just thought I'd share that with you. Oh! And Nonoxynol-9 can numb your mouth. Remember, only use this power for good.
What, you ask? My damn sneakers!
It was after my Saturday run in Central Park with the Front Runners, when I was taking a shower at the upper west side gym, where I use their lockers to keep a change of clothes. Being raised in New York (and therefore 'street smart'), I lock up all my belongings when I know I can't keep an eye on them; except for my sneakers, where I place in front of my locked locker. Who wants smelly sneakers with their clean clothes, right?
I mean, who wants smelly sneakers at all?! (Except them of course.)
After my shower, I returned to my locker and my sneakers were gone! I thought the cleaning guy took them (to the front desk or lost and found); I mean, that's what I hoped as I continued to dress and scan the locker room (secretly grateful that I locked up everything else). Every single guy in a towel was suspect. The hotter, the more suspect.
Of course, they weren't at the front desk, nor did the cleaning guy take them. Instead, some crazy is probably using it as a champagne glass.
Well, the bright side is I get to go shoe shopping. Yay!
And I might be the one in trouble.
After a long, long tour schecule, my boopy is finally back in New York! I'm so excited!
As always, I won't be posting about my love life here, as I think it's something you should pry out of me in person. But if I'm (even more) lax in posting, you'll know why.
You can ask about the rope burns though.
Also, now that restaurant week is over (though some restaurants are extending their prix fixe menus until Labor Day) I have a few more stories to tell; one where I was labeled the "Charlotte". I don't know how I feel about that; though, she is the prettiest.
But first things first...
* Not a club, the neighborhood of Astoria, Queens.
I can only follow my previous post by posting this link. This shows what kind of geek I am.
Speaking about games, I have a Scene-It play date... anyone have any tips on how I can cheat? Well, if not, I'll kick their ass in Mortal Combat; and I'm not talking about wrestling, though I know the 'finishing moves' for either situation.
And if that doesn't work, I'm breaking out the DDR.
Omg, I'm such a geek.
What's up with all these bloggers becoming podcasters nowadays? Almost makes me want to pull a Zidane.
On second thought, I think I might start one myself. I know enough crazy people that it might just work. And by crazy, I mean neurotic, narcissistic, and incredibly entertaining. Naturally, I mean bloggers.
Speaking of which, I hung out with a few of them last night. It's Restaurant Week here in New York City, so I used that as an excuse to have some good food and conversation. We went to Riingo, so at least the conversation was good.
Okay, the food wasn't horrible, I would even say it was good; but there was just no 'wow' factor. In the end, the price just didn't justify the small portions and mediocrity. There's just better deals out there; and naturally, I already have plans to find them.
Or they need to cut me off when I stop random straight boys that I think are cute and tell them that my friend, the hot chica, thinks they're cute. Without her consent. Or her knowledge for that matter.
Because then I start snapping pictures1.
Yep, that's the picture of the victim and the target I took last Saturday at some Lower East Side basement bar while participating in some 'Critical Dance/Bar Hopping' event. We lost the group and were left to our own devices.
In other words, we were too drunk to realize they had left for the next bar.
And while we're talking about 'knowing better', they shouldn't have given me bacon if they didn't want me to savor it like it was meant to be savored.
Know what I mean?
1 Why? To determine if they're actually cute when you've sobered up!
Why is it called an 'air conditioner'? I would make more sense if it were called an 'air cooler'. You wouldn't even have to change the way you refer to it abbreviated: the 'AC'.
Speaking of which, I think I'm going to start referring to my air purifier as an 'air shampoo'.
Within the past three days, I found myself talking about the Brazilian wax I had more than a year ago. On three separate occasions. If something else happens in thrice, I'm going to wonder if someone is trying to drop me a hint.
This past Saturday, I ran around Central Park with the Front Runners. 6.2 miles - the longest distance I've ever ran at once. And when I say ran, I mean jog, jog, jog, walk, walk, jog, walk, fall down, roll over, and die. Luckily, I had a jogging buddy to save me. We celebrated my accomplishment by shopping, of course.
Today, I was lucky enough to tour Steiner Studios at the Brooklyn Naval Yard. It's just amazing the amount of work that goes into movie making, even more so all the details of setting up a sound stage. Thanks BFF!
And since it's July 4th, and I am a model american citizen (blogger), I must recycle this fabulous display of nationalism. Happy Independence Day ya'll. I hope everyone rebels in their own way until they get what they want.
As you know, last weekend was Pride in NYC. I had the same itinerary as I did last year: Pride brunch, take in a bit of the parade, then volunteer for the Pier Dance. And like last year, I had an amazing time. But this year, I had more guests!
Jason came early in the morning and joined me for the brunch and parade. Kvn met us at the parade and volunteered at the dance. I was also joined by Charles and a gaggle of bloggers: Byrne, David, Traveling Spotlight, and Tuna Girl.
Last year, I was too scared to go out into the masses of shirtless, withering flesh and muscle. This year, I had other people to get squished along with me. For the most part, everyone was pretty civil, not a lot of pushing or stepping on toes.
That is, until J.Lo was about to perform - that's when them queens got ugly (and some uglier). People pushed and we were packed like a can of sardines. In a garbage compactor. Like J.Lo was going to hand out Fleet enemas or something. Most of them probably didn't like her all that much, but she's still my hot dancing boriqua mami. Caliente! I would have a billion pictures of her, but my cameras' battery died.
A lot has been going on.. and I've been going on a lot - but not on this blog, obviously. But it's Friday now; so I'm going to take this opportunity to diverge from my work responsibilities (shh!) and play catch up. After all, it is Pride Week - don't make me start a riot. Read more [+/-]
Last Saturday, I attended and participated in the Anti-Violence Project's March Against Hate Crimes, otherwise known as the "This is New York City Bitch; You Can't Fuck With Us" march. Approximately 500 people showed up, including our host, Hedda Lettuce.
Meeting Jason earlier that morning, we headed to the location where Kevin Aviance was attacked (where the march starts), 14th st. and 1st ave, and met up with Crash and Charles. As the march began making its way down 13th street, the police quickly realized that the sheer amount of people could not (would not?) be limited to marching on the sidewalk.
So, with police escorting, we continued on, turning down 7th ave, to Christopher St park. Hedda continued her jib and then Kevin made an appearance; but after he left, so did we.
On Sunday, after a quick jaunt through the Renegade Craft Fair and a little bit of dim sum, I took Jason, my roommate, and my new girlfriend to Folsom Street East X! I wasn't as scared this time as I had more bodies to hide behind if some leather daddy came and tried to spank me. The sun was pounding down on us mercilessly and I felt sorry for the people in leather. It's hot, so you sweat, so the leather gets tighter, and you get even hotter. What a vicious cycle. Especially the one fellow with full scuba gear on - what's that all about?
The show was great; incredibly entertaining, fun, and downright scandalous. It took me forever to find (and tip) that scantily clad hunk with the huge bat - and I was completely oblivious to the dancer who spread eagle right in front of me as I reached past him to bat-boy's undies; until he yelled at me, "Hello! I do this and you're going to tip him?!" Oops.
Tuesday, I went to the WYSIWYG Talent Show - Way Gay: Even Gayer Gay Gayness at the Bowery Poetry Club, where I lovingly bumped into evilbuddha, mike p, cscfon, david, and jake. I missed the first performer, but the rest of the show didn't disappoint. A lot of fun, a lot of laughs, and very gay.
One told a story about being told he bore resemblance to a Village Person on TV - something I could relate to, err, not the Village Person part. One spoke about dating mishaps - something I could also relate to. One spoke of "Good Butch" and "Bad Butch" then proceeded to recite rap lyrics. One performer spoke about going to an ex-gay camp - of which I couldn't relate too as I was so entranced by his work uniform: whitey tighties. Pictures here - you figure it out.
I went back to the Bowery Poetry Club on Wednesday for House of Xavier's Glam Slam 2006. Met mike p. there, had a beer, had some fun.
Yesterday (Thursday), my company had a GLBT networking event; though I missed him at the event, a high ranking officer of my group was there. Being so low in the pecking order, I've never met the guy, so I had no idea who he was. But he's gay! And after some 'research', I found out that he had just recently stepped out of the closet (and to my surprise, it turns out that a lot of other people in my company did the same - but I'm not one to gossip). Interesting.
After work was another company networking event at Vlada - they have delicious vodkas by the way. Then volunteer training at the Center (I'll be volunteering for Dance on the Pier 20 this Sunday! Come say 'Hi!'); Gym bar with Crash, kvn, patrick, and tunagirl; and ending the night at Splash.
Whew! It was a great week. Now I hope it doesn't rain on my parade.
Happy Pride ya'll!
Her true colors? Pink and glittery. And 10 inches long.1 Hee!
But seriously, she did an awesome rendition of True Colors; and so did all five thousand of her backup singers. I'll admit that I joined in right along (although I barely knew the words to the chorus) and even got a little misty eyed. Damn you mob mentality!!
But the real highlight of the night? Bumping into her while she partook in the tipping2! Squeal!
1 Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures; but I'm sure they'll surface soon enough.
2 At the end of the show, the audience is encouraged to grope tip the performers to raise even more money!
How about going to work the next day. And falling asleep during a meeting. With only four other people. And having one of them come up to you afterwards and telling you they saw you 'nodding off'.
But it was all worth it. (I was alert for 90% of the meeting anyway.)
In case you were wondering, that's me after the red-eye flight. Pretty, huh? More pictures and/or stories soon.
As in "rollin' down the street, smokin' indo, sippin' on gin and juice" (not that other one).
What's that mean? I'm treating myself to a birthday trip to Los Angeles, baby! The city of Angels and riots. Plastic and pumps. Fake boobs and fake tans. Gin and juice. Sun and sand. Steroids and back pimples. Should be a good time.
My main reason for this destination is because my boopy is currently there for work. And I want to make sure he remembers what New York City has to offer.
And wouldn't you know that my trip coincides with LA Pride! Oh yes, there will be pictures.
Ya'll have a wonderful weekend now, y'hear!
I was SO excited when I found out the whole gay blog-o-sphere wanted to get together to celebrate my birthday. Then I realized it coincided with Gay Bloggers: New York City 3. Still, very cool nonetheless.
The rain carried on into Saturday, which made it hard to attend the picnic I had planned to go to; which also meant that I didn't get to see that special St. Petersburgian. However, the arrival of another out of towner had cheered up (and blow me away).
Later that night, some more bloggers were headed to The Eagle to continue in the debauchery. I was estatic. The only other time I went was during Folsom East last year; and that time, I wasn't 'prepared' for it. This time, I was determined to dress for the part (the best I knew how with my current wardrobe); and what that means was wearing a leather cuff around my wrist and a leather belt around my neck.
Whatever, it was hot. And the night was awesome. I even spotted the 'I like your ASS-sets' guy (luckily he didn't recognize me).
By 12:00 am, it was officially my birthday and I made sure that everyone knew it. Ah, there's nothing like drunk hugs, I tell ya. Though no one thought to buy me a drink (Ha! I blew up all your spots!).
After a few hours of not being forced to binge drink until my liver failed, my new straight girlfriend called me up to another party. My roommate was there also, and surprisingly, no one there bought me drinks either. Has buying birthday drinks gone the way of leg warmers, out of fashion? WTF man, wtf.
It's June! Whee! That means it's time to celebrate PRIDE month and Gemini birthdays!
Happy Birthday Geminis! Let's celebrate!
Oops, too late, I already started. Last night I attended a 'Gemini Birthday Bash' at OWs, where I got to catch up with a few friends I haven't seen in ages. After some delicious finger food and drinks, I was ready to celebrate another Gemini's birthday at Splash; it was Campus Thursdays, and since I still look young (thank you Asian genes) and hot (thank you Abercrombie jeans) enough to pass being a college student, I got us in for free.
Fun was had by all; and after a few $3 Long Island, things started to become blurry. The few moments of clarity in the haze I call 'memories' are:
And while I'm on the topic of drunken gayziness, I'll be headed to GB:NYC - III shortly. That's the annual gay blogger gettogether. I think this year there's going to be awards given out. Or I just made that up. You'll just have to come and find out! And yes, I will be taking pictures.
Hope everyone is enjoying their Memorial Day weekend. I am; especially since it coincides with Fleet Week.
Went out dirty dancin' the past two nights, had a good time; but you know what bugs me? Arriving to the club in time for free admission, waiting in line for 20 minutes, and then find out you can't get in free because the stupid bitch says you have to bring the email, even if the email itself doesn't say so specifically (JB, what's up with that?).
Okay, so I understand it's not her fault she's a stupid bitch. And enough with all this negativity; it's a great day and I'm going sunning in Central Park. If anything can help me recharge my batteries, this can. And by 'this', I mean the shirtless boys running around the park. Ciao!
Originally uploaded by jasonsmith.
The fantabulous photographer Jason (JasonSmith.com), came up to New York City for the opening of the Apple Store. Check out his photos of our adventures running (and jumping) around the streets of New York City, bumping into Ted Allen and Steve Jobs, and visiting the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
I don't I can even begin to express my excitement for the grand opening of the Apple Cube here in NYC!
OMFG! I AM SO EXCITED! (Hm.. I guess I can.)
And I'm not excited just because store looks absolutely amazing, is situated right near LV, or it's virtually going to be open 24/7/365; they're giving away free t-shirts and having a MacBook giveaway every hour for 24 hours!
OMFG! I AM SO EXCITED! (There I go again!)
I am SO there! Stay tuned for a follow up (and possibly some pics)!
Read more craziness at Cult of Mac Blog.
And hello Life With Abandon!
For over a year I've lived a conservative lifestyle1. But soon, that will all change: I'm getting benefits!
Ah.. such a wonderous word: benefits. bene-, from the ebonical phrase be need, as in 'I be needing them benefits!'
But damn, there's so much to do to actually get the benefits. First off, I have to enroll. Which requires me to make decisions! Which means I have to do research. All this stuff is so involved!
All kidding aside, I wasn't opposed to doing the leg work, but where do I start? There was so much information! I turned to my friends and mentors. They advised that as a same-sex loving individual I should find a doctor that would be sensative to my needs - but where to find an assologist? I wasn't about to call up each doctor office listed and ask if there was a Dr. Seymore Butts (again).
So, as a gen-whatever, I turned to ever-dependable google; 'assologist' didn't yield many helpful results, and neither did 'gay doctor new york' - which returned information mainly about treating HIV/AIDS. When I found a list, how would I know which are good? Most profiles were incomplete and figuring out if they accepted my insurance was not easy at all.
All that said, the internet didn't fully disappoint; I found some helpful reference material:
I especially like GayHealth.com's Ask a Doctor section. Have any more I should look into? For now, I think I'll go check out some recommended doctors and see how that goes. Wish me luck! I even bought a clean pair of tighty-whities2!
1 Not really; but it's all relative, right?
2 Why, C-IN2's Lo.No.Show.Army (with support) of course!
3 Can you believe that this didn't show up on any of my searches?! I only learned about them through friends!
"Who needs class when you have crass?" - the best epigram to come out of my mouth tonight.
It was the first Gaysian Night of the year, and if you ask me, one that's sorely overdue. Aside from some missing players, and some unforeseen additions (one not gay, and the other not Asian), it was a deliciously good time.
There was good food and conversation; why, the phrase above was a result of discussing how sending explicit photos of yourself via cameraphone to hookups found on Craigslist was pretty classless; and potentially disasterous if you mistakenly send the photos to your entire phonebook.
Can you count the number of things wrong with the previous paragraph? Pictures coming soon!
Last Thursday, I went a reading of Possible Side Effects, the new book by Augusten Burroughs, at the Union Square Barnes and Nobles. He read Moving Violations (a short story from his book, about his friend, Druggy Debbie, and their exploits flashing bad drivers enlarged, explicit sex photos - you'll just have to read it), and did some Q&A - people ask the weirdest questions.
As I was standing in the back, I realized how much I admired him (and still do); after all, he inspired me to start writing again, and even tried to emulate his style and honesty on this blog. It was because of this admiration that I stood in line for an hour to have him sign my book. And because of this admiration that I spent the whole time rehearsing in my head a perfect conversation starter:
"'I love you.' No.
'I really, really love you.' Uhm, stalker alert.
'I love your work!' Well, why else would I be here?
'You're awesome!' Way to go, Mr. Original.
'I'm your biggest fan!' Wack. What if he asks me to prove it?
'Remember me? I'm the especially crazy fan who took a photo with you, turned it into a postcard, and then give it to you at another reading!' Wait.. how did it go again? Shit, nevermind. I'm thinking too much. Don't think about it. Calm down, be cool and natural. It's going to be fine. Go with the flow."
As I got closer and closer, the more nervous I became, until I reached the stairs to the stage and my knees started to shake. I wished I had a minute to regain my composure, but in an instant I was standing in front of him, handing him my book. Off guard and unable to act normal, I tried to put on my most natural smile.
And then he said, "Hi Jason." What?! He remembers me?! I didn't prepare for this conversation! How did he know.. oh, it's right there on the post-it.
"Hey Augusten... I just.. (inaudible babbling here).. uhm.. nevermind."
"No, no. What were you going to say?" he kindly urged.
I had to take a deep breath and focus - he had given me a second chance!
"I just wanted to say... 'Thank You' for inspiring me to start writing (again)."
He looked up at me with genuine interest. "Really?"
"Yep. When I started on your second book.. uhm.. Dry, right? I started really writing on my blog."
"Yea.. hey, I noticed you started a blog on your new site, too.."
"Oh. Right. Well, right now it's kind of... stupid..."
"You probably don't have a lot of time to update it, with all that traveling..."
"...we'll see how it turns out. You should email me your blog address and I'll check it out."
"That'd be so cool. I will."
"Okay, have a great night."
"Uhm.. Great, Thanks! I mean, you have a great night too."
By the time I was done tripping over myself trying to get away from that embarrasing situation, I was quietly rejoicing about my signed book and semi-awkward-yet-successful conversation. He was actually interested in my blog! How awesome is that?!
Well, it was only when I got home that I realize I didn't have his email address. Le sigh.
I just got goosebumps watching the trailer for X3! I'm so excited! Wait.. does that make me a geek?
Speaking about 'can't wait' movies, The Da Vinci Code is coming out soon, too. Question is, should I read the book first?
Speaking about 'being there', I'm three days into my new job and they still haven't fired me yet. I'm on a roll!
When I was asked to run the 4-mile leg of a 'teamed triathlon' this fall, I hesitated. I wasn't worried about the running part; I started running recreationally back in college. Now I do an average of two miles at the gym (to keep my lithe figure, of course). I was worried about the competitive aspect.
No one likes to lose, and I've never handled it well; I used to beat myself up if I did - I had to be the best! At everything! Ah.. the mental self-mutilation to compensate for being in the closet; I remember it well.
I've since come out of the closet and accepted the fact that there are people out there that are better at some things than I am; but why put myself in a position to lose if I can control it? Same reasoning applies to why I don't gamble.
In spite of my 'avoid competition' mentality, I decided this time to go against my fears and participate in the triathlon. After all, I'm about self improvement, mentally and physically (duh, I knew I went to the gym for some reason), and that's how I'm approaching it. (Plus, I was assured that my team was doing it recreationally.)
Friendly competition isn't so bad, and neither is losing, as long as you can turn it into positive motivation and forgive yourself for things that are out of your control.
Today was a perfect day for a jog. I had a 4-mile training course planned out that involved the Williamsburg Bridge. Everything was fine until I started to ascend the the bridge. That's when I realized that the allergy pill I took right before wasn't such a good idea: I was having trouble breathing. As a result of the medication, my nose and mouth started to dry up causing my saliva and phlegm to congeal in the back of my throat and sinuses, blocking up my airways.
Determined, I focused on the Black Eye Peas babbling about their humps in my ears, breathed hard through my mouth, and made it to the other side without stopping. Victory!
I basked in the glow of my accomplishment, enjoying a light breeze, before turning back to face the bridge and realizing I was only at my halfway mark. And since my body was still trying to suffocate itself, I decided taking the train would be in my best interest.
One great thing about my soon-to-be-ex job is that it's in Tribeca; and even better is that the Tribeca Film Festival ticket booth is only a block away. It starts today! There's definitely some films I want to catch. Did you get your tickets yet? You can buy them online1, though some of the popular films and times have sold out of advanced tickets2.
Being gay, I was 'naturally' drawn to all the movies with gay themes; it's almost compulsory, as if I had to watch them all to make up for the lack of homo-sex education taught in school (both officially and unofficially). So I'm seeing Fat Girls this Saturday. Some other movies were sold out, but I might take a chance at the door.
And being gay, I had the innate talent3 to run into and recognize (and then to quickly avert my eyes to avoid being labelled as the lunatic celebrity fan that I am) the two ugliest, hot actors4 in Hollywood, probably in town for the festivities: Mr. Bacon and Mr. Hawke.
Oh, Mr. De Niro. Come out, come out, wherever you are!
1 It didn't matter to me, because I have to purchase the tickets at the box office to get my 'downtown residence discount' (not to rub it in or nothing).
2 Don't fret! You may still be able to get Door Tickets by queueing 30 minutes before the show.
3 Or it could have been the fact I was walking around Tribeca during my lunch hour. Who knows?
4 You know what I mean, but I'll be damned if they're not f'ing talented!
Wind, rain, and a 20 degree drop in temperature? Must you be so dramatic for my last week of work? Be kind and give me a nice, warm send off, okay? Love you like a fat kid loves cake!
Peace and chicken grease,
It's my last week at my current job. I still can't believe it. This place is like my second family. (Almost) everyone here is nice, kind, and a pleasure to work with; and I've become comfortable in the work situation (which almost always raises warning flags) - one of the reasons why I think the change will be good.
I start my new job next Monday. I know, it's no rest for the weary; so in the meantime, I find time to have fun at work!
So last Thursday I went to meet up with some guys that run a modest lil' podcast (out of Chicago) who came to New York City for a meet and greet, hosted at the Starlight Bar and Lounge. You might have heard of them, Feast of Fools, also known as the #1 gay podcast in all the world! Over 200 shows under their belt and counting!
Okay, so they're not so little, and not at all modest; but they are definitely hilarious! And in person, these guys are nothing but genuine, nice, warm, and welcoming - what the hell are they doing in New York City again?! (Just kidding, don't kick me off the island!) By the way, if you get a few drinks in them, they're even more entertaining.
So if this is the first time you've heard of them, put in those earbuds and download a show or two (why not start with one they did on their trip to New York City)? You can thank me later. In that nice, special way, of course.
My FOF Pics on Flickr (now with more pics!)
It's nowhere near original, and I've definitely heard it somewhere else before, but the following conversation (that started about my leaving) really took place during lunch. Read more [+/-]
Female Co-worker: "I really sucks that you're leaving."
Me: "I know, but what are you going to do?"
Female Co-worker: "Who else am I going to get help from? It's so hard talking to those tech people. It's like they have ass-burgers or something."
Me: "Haha. Ass-burgers?"
Female Co-worker: "Yea! It's a disease, like autism. Like when you ask them a question and they answer like a robot, void of all emotion."
Me: "Oh! Asperger! I really thought you said ass-burger!"
We both crack up.
Female Co-worker: "Haha! Hmm.. I'm not even sure how that would work."
Me: "Don't get me started!"
But it was already too late; ass-burgers had already started floating around in my head.
It's official. At the end of the month, I will be leaving my current job for another. And going through the deliberations for the past week put me on edge that I almost crapped my pants.
On the one hand, I needed to move on (and the job offer I got was good). On the other hand, I felt really bad about leaving all my co-workers.
"At least you gave us a months notice; that really says a lot about a person."
That's what my boss said after I built up enough courage to tell him the bad news. I was a nervous mess, but he was understanding and very supportive. As we continued to talk, I couldn't help but continue to apologize for leaving; they were really good to me.
"Don't worry, you'll live." I hope so. And thanks for the memories.